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Sunday, May 31, 2015

Looking UP

I promised to blog today. I woke with a new outlook, looking UP. Because we all know looking down is just a waist of time, energy and emotion.

So after spending most of my day with my Big Dog who can't walk and is happily spirited but in such pain I blew off the blog.

But I need to continue to look UP. Because, as I said, looking down is a, well, downer... So I'm counting blessings.  I have a husband who helped me create two beautiful children. I live in a castle. I HAVE  a Mom and Dad in-law who are the contest. My mom is physically in pain every single day, but she thinks I rock the world. I have my Daddy, whom I take after a lot and I own that proudly. I have three handsome, smart brothers.

Sh!t happens. I have a friend I've lost to mental issues, I have another very dear friend battling cancer, my Biggun', my Brandi girl is scheduled to be put out of her pain and misery Tuesday... If she makes it that long.

But looking UP, I've been so blessed with the important people in my life and my family and pets and how much they all seem to find me as this fantastic person and to continue to love me... Even when I stumble and curse and lose my happy demeanor.

So tired... Dismayed... I'm reminded that if you lose someone or something close to you that means you were blessed enough to have that as a part of your life. So when you feel like cursing the world or God and saying it isn't fair. You have to rember that if it weren't for God we wouldn't have the lucky, blessed opportunity to love and be loved so deeply that the loss hurts. Loss hurts...but it is recognition that we put ourselves and hearts out there. Love is strong, love is brave. And without love we would have nothing. So this is ME looking Up. Filling my glass. With the love I have for
everyone and the love so many give me... Happy Sunday! Look up.


Friday, May 15, 2015

SUMMER already here yet already over! SERIOUSLY?

Howdy y'all,

So just as the school year is winding down (the kids last week is next week with Thursday and Friday being half days) we are already super booked!

This weekend I am going to my life long friend, Ali's 40th birthday party! She is joining the 40s club! Also, the house they purchased about a year ago and have totally renovated to try and put it back to its more original, eclectic status, will be turning 100 years old. I can't believe all the work that has gone into this project and I CAN'T WAIT to see it!

Come Monday-ish I am going to OOOOKLAHOOOOMMMAAA to see Terri next week so Hubby has the reins for the last week of school. Then school is OUT FOR SUMMER!

Shortly after we head to the FRIO! With all the rain we have had I've been told the water is running quite smoothly - after last year's trip it is life jackets for both kids.

Then we come back to check on the mosquitoes and the sweltering, drowning crops for a few days.

Then off to ALABAMA and GEORGIA!

Then home, but not for long. While Hubby is in the field (hopefully, fingers crossed), we are going to ARKANSAS to see my Daddy and two of my brothers AND my nephew! Daddy had a pond put in on the place for swimming and kayaking and of course, FJ's most or almost most favorite thing to do, FISH!!! The fish will still be babies but that won't stop FJ from staying out there all day and into the evening until I pull him back in for S'mores. :-)

Depending on the crops, Hubby might actually make it up to Arkansas with us this summer.

Finally, and exhausted we will return home. Take a breather. The boys will high tail it into the field to harvest whatever hasn't drowned. Meanwhile, Lil'Gal and I will be spending OUR 4th of July back in OOOOKLAHOMA for Heather and Tim's wedding! Summer is short but life is shorter, at least sometimes. So, it appears I will be spending most of our summer break on the road. But I will be seeing so many important people, making wonderful memories, events that will never be forgotten. Family, friends, scenery, love. And if that doesn't make for a perfect summer, then summer ain't all it is cracked up to be.

But it is. I HEART summer.

So in summary, I will be seeing my life-long BFF, Ali, for her 40th tomorrow along with her hubby and kids and several other people I haven't seen in decades. Then I will be heading out to see my shiny gal Terri, her hubby Roger and her daughter Heather and soon to be new son-in-law.

Then I will soak and enjoy the sun at the flowing Frio. Some friends of ours might be able to get a cabin to join us.

Come home, laundry and household duties just to pack up AGAIN to go see my Daddy and two of my brothers, SJ and Rye-Rye and my nephew Drew.

Return, Hubby and Farmer, Jr. get, as Hubby calls it, 'balls-to-the-walls-crazy in the field harvesting meanwhile Lil'Gal and I head back to OOOOKLAHOMA for Heather and Tim's wedding to celebrate the 4th of July! I wonder if they will have fireworks other than the kind that fly when you get married.

Come MY BIRTHDAY school will be starting back around the 20th of July. Whatever closest Monday that falls on. Oh, I can't forget to miss the school supply sales somewhere within there.

I'm going to be busy. Lots of on the road time. Putting this new hip to work driving long hours and dancing through the night. But such a busy schedule just means that "HOLEY COW-PATTIES... HOW BLESSED I AM."

Enjoy your Friday. I'm enjoying mine. While waiting for the appliance guy to come out for the seventh, eighth time to try and 'fix' our fridge.... But it is still Friday! Hugs and smooches. XXXXs and OOOO. Hogs and Kisses... Life is short. Embrace it, grab it by the tail and don't let the negativity get you down.

Speaking of tails, Buck Owens says it best. Grab that tiger by its tail and enjoy the ride:


Monday, May 11, 2015

Mother's Day and Other Stuff... you know, catch up.

So yesterday was Mother's day. My baby SIL and her Hubby hosted a wonderful Mother's Day BBQ for both sides of the family. There was a great turn out. Chicken, beans, salad this, salad that, fruit, beer. (BEER). :-D

Being the left-over-hore I am, we were hanging around and trying to help some with clean up and putting things away. As blessed as I am, I scored left over chicken and BEANS! Guess what WE had for dinner? So, they not only hosted a wonderful, come together family lunch but they also saved me from having to make dinner. Thank baby SIL and BIL!

This year, well the past year and a half has brought a lot of 'light' to the reality and the longevity but also the fact that in a moment - it is all over. Life can be, that is.

I've had my issues, my hip replacement and all (there was some depression with that and anger and fear) but I am doing REALLY WELL considering the severity of the surgery. Total replacement at 42.

Although on a negative note - the ten pounds I lost before the surgery? With a hip that had me constantly falling down and over and out of bed and off the potty, etc, etc, until TMI. I've since put the weight back on with an extra pound or two. This is SO ODD FOR ME because I was always the tiny person every secretly envied because I have or HAD the genetics of a high metabolism. D@MMIT All. That started going down hill at 38-39. Anyhow, that is supposed to be another post. (YES, I'm going to try and post AGAIN.... AND THIS WEEK!)

But, I realized that although I had a less than perfect childhood. And my youngest brother had to grow up on the other side of that. I think I am finally a grown up. It is like a light... WE THINK we are grown up when we can buy booze and cigarets (I don't smoke, but you get the point). Then, we get married and we think, "NOW? I'm a grown up." Then we hit 30 and it is like, "YO, youngins' in your 20s, you are so far off. From adult hood. Just because you can party and buy booze and vote and all. I'm pregnant. I run a business. I'm having a kid. And then, I had another one.

Then it was mid 30s and I was all, SUPER MOM. I KICK @$$ at everything (but I didn't sleep for about five years. And now. If I am sleeping the rule is - DON'T BOTHER ME LEST THE HORNS COME OUT.) Oh yeah. That's another sign of being a true grown up.

Then I hit my forties. I have had a lot of life changes, a lot of lives lost, a lot of physical changes and then suddenly.... Even though I can have 'TUDE' and all. I was like, well a few months ago. HOLEY CR@P. I think at almost 43? I really AM  grown up. I had a year off of being totally out of whack (HEY, PAIN AND BAD FRIENDS WILL DO THAT TOO YOU; AND BEING A WOMAN IN HER 40S SUCKS YOUR EMOTIONS INTO THAT TORNADIC VAULT OF WTH is happening to me.)

But, I think I'm clearing that stage. With some rest, some reality, lots of love for people and xanax. Thank God for xanax. Who knew it could make a mentally unstable control freak perfectionist pretend everything is going to be okay optimist be ... NORMAL? HA HA HA HA! Lucky me!

But, I have come to some new conclusions. My Mom and Dad are wonderful people. I love them dearly and they might love me more. I can talk to either of them about anything. ANY-THING. Sometimes Hubby is like, "You talk about that with them?!!!" Uh... Yeah. So maybe we are more stable because we all started out so unstable. All three as kids finding our way.

My brothers? I adore. Two from Dad and one from Mom. He's the baby but now he is 20 and... all grown up. We all have grown up conversations and then we discuss our dysfunctions and then we laugh. So, you know. Mother's Day and family days and -- I just love'em all. And I think I am finally, FINALLY, a grown up. A fun loving one. A crack a dirty joke (which I wouldn't have done in my thirties), grown up. And sometimes we have to tell people either A) I F-up. I'm not perfect but neither are you; even stevens? Or B) I am not a perfect person, but I am a perfect me.

Hugs and Happy Mother's day.

Friday, May 1, 2015

Driving kids to school; what it is really like~

As we all know, it can sometimes be a very hairy morning trying to get the kids from the house, to the vehicle after feeding them and cleaning up and making sure that they don't forget their lunches, their backpacks their permission slips, there musical or sports items and their personalities without some p!$$ing and moaning.

Now this particular morning we were right on track, almost early versus leaving behind schedule. Mind you this meant that for the second time this week I drove them wearing 'white trash style' and following all the speed limits and rules so as not to be so embarrassed to be pulled over in my camo top and shorts PJs and glasses and hair in a half-@$$ clip.

Now, mind you. Children have conversations on the way to school and I enjoy participating. But when the convo goes boring for me or out of my understanding I turn my radio back up and listen to some Comedy on Sirius XM (Hubby rocks that he pays for this for me).

So, as it happens with kids... or anyone, there is this very good bit on by Carlos Mencia. Now he is so funny to me because he loves America and loves our diversity but at the same time can crack you up until you cry about our diversity among races and social standing.

So, I'm listening to him and then the children (right behind me, I tell them I got an SUV with a third row seat for a reason) and they are discussing and then arguing about something I am clueless about. Something about school and a class they both have but one is in sixth grade and one is in seventh. Interrupting my morning laugh, which I love to get it on because I fuels my optimism and my mood.

Finally, I turn the radio down (missing some of this bit) and I belt out, "DO YOU WANNA' BUILD A SNOW MAAAAAAAN?" Both kids simultaneously "MOM! NOOOOOOOO!"

Me, "It doesn't have to be a SNOW MAN!" Farmer, Jr. momentarily distracted from their disapproval, "Can it be a dog?" *SQUIRREL* Lil'Gal, "NO, MOM STOP!" Farmer, Jr, *Oh yeah* "Mom! Quit torturing us."


Then, they became quite and I was able to listen to my comedy channels the rest of the way to school without interruption. And as I laughed, I wasn't just laughing at the comedy skits but also at the fact that I over powered their argument and actually bought myself some silence on the way to school - less the comedy - Mama has power! LOL!

Anyhow, I thought parents would get a kick out of this and maybe take note to try it sometime!

Happy Friday!!!!