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Wednesday, April 16, 2008

PFC: Challenge #3

It's that time again! PFC day. Brought to us by That Rambling Mad Man. I've enjoyed his ingenious little monthly writing challenge. Here are the pics and details for this months challenge:

I wasn't totally thrilled with the "character" pic. If you click to enlarge it you will see that this is possibly a "cross-dressing" rock star? Face like a guy and half a Gal's body? I'm not sure. But to each his/her own. Luckily, in a sudden "light-bulb" moment, my character for my story developed.



Objective emmitted "transition" and "movement" to me.



The Setting is just a beautiful shot. Leave's me with the feeling that the city is so loud, yet so quietly beautiful from afar.



This little guy was kinda' hard too at first because I felt like he upset the whole "mood" that was developing in my story. Like he didn't fit. But, then he fell into place.



The bird, I really enjoy. Fit just right.



Anyhow, that's my little take on the pics for this month's challenge. The way my mind works, is just suddenly it starts narrating the story in my head and then I hit the keyboard when time allows to grasp the general concept. And, I re-visit it later to finish it up.

Let me know what you think!

"A Life to Love"

I made bad choices, on purpose. I went wild. Before that day, I wasn't a wild person. I was well rounded and fit into that "pretty little box" all wrapped in ribbon. The box all mom's and dad's want to wrap their children up in. I wanted out of that box before I smothered. I no longer fit in that box.

When we fell into each other's lives, we never spent a moment apart. Our kisses were so sweet and soft. And, when we made love we were one in motion. It wasn't about the sex. It was about us. We were calm, cool, rousing, and at the same time energized by one another. We were the cliche'. "They'll be over each other in a summer." "It's just puppy love." All the things older people say because they are jealous of the fact that they are so tied up in "presenting themselves" in their facade, they can no longer love like us.

Gosh we truly were so magnificent together. So in love. The kind of love and passion you feel after watching one of those romantic movies about young love. Like "A Walk to Remember." Yea, we were like that. That's the kind of love we shared.

While away, I experimented with life. I experimented with my sexuality. I experimented with drugs and similar paraphenalia. I became the "bad girl." In ways, I'm ashamed of that now though I probably shouldn't be. It was a learning experience and a freeing experience. I was LOUD and living out loud because I wanted to be louder than my life.

All the while singing out so loudly through my life doing whatever I wanted and whenever I felt like it. Singing a brashly metal song. Breaking all the rules and boundaries, but that other little song was always chirping softly in a far, cobwebbed corner of my mind. Like the tune of a bird....a Yellow Warbler. Those are common in the place I come from.

It's been so long since I've been back there. Fifteen years, give or take. After he left me I couldn't stand the quiet anymore. I had to get away. So I did. I left. And, I never looked back...too afraid I'd loose my nerve. It was just me and his sock puppet he'd left in the car.

So, here I sit. Hands tight, knuckles white on the wheel. His sock puppet still by my side. Fifteen years later I'm returning. Making that long, traveling, drive to all that I so desperately ran away from to escape. Fifteen years and yet I haven't delt with him leaving me yet.

It's getting quieter now. Fewer buildings, less cement and asphalt. More trees, and leaves and sky. I'm getting closer. I no longer see city blocks but I see mountains of landscape all created by a larger life source.

I can't believe he called me. How did he even find me? After all this time? He wants to be a part of my life. He wants me to be a part of his. Where does this understanding and forgiveness come from? I think by feeling it I am learning.

It was the creation of a love of a lifetime. But, when he left me I had to give it up. I feared I couldn't be the person that would be required of me. Sure, I've regretted it. But, so long as I lived so loudly I couldn't hear the regret in my mind and I couldn't feel the pain in my heart.

When I got the call, though? I heard it again and felt it again. And, it is on this drive that I will deal with it. I will mourn my loss and be great full for what is a new start.

Though, I lost the love of a lifetime, I realize I have second chance. Not many are so lucky. I will love him. I'll wrap him up in that perfect little box and tie him up sweetly with a big blue bow.

I no longer want to be loud. I no longer have to be loud. Had I only known or been wise enough back in the beginning to realize that I could have them both, in a way. Because my love of a lifetime lives on through our son. He left me something behind after all.
_______________________________________________________________

A comment. At the last minute I toyed with the idea of changing my main character to a guy, thus changing the gender rolls in the story. I think it would have read and made a little more sense in some ways. But, then I decided it would get too much away from the "character" in the picture. And, by keeping it the way it is, I thought it to be less easy to realize the ending before reading upon it.

Lastly, when conflicted about a decision I've always done best going with my first instinct. So, this is what I first wrote and I kept it this way.

Happy Reading and Happy Wednesday!


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11 comments:

Jay said...

Great story! I didn't know where you were going with it until the very end. I enjoyed that very much.

I had a tough time with the character too. Pretty tough to tell if it was a woman or a dude, but I went with woman too.

Knight said...

Wow, you really threw me off. I didn't see that coming at all. It seemed so clear on my second read through. Great story. Loved it.

Newt said...

The thought crossed my mind but then it faded away only to come WHAM right back at the end. Very sweet story. I like this one. Much nicer and happier than the shared brain story Jay and I each wrote.

captain corky said...

That was a very touching story. You did a great job with it.

Jo said...

So different from your other stories! I really enjoyed your pacing & style in this...it had a grit to it. The opening paragraph was fantastic, put me right in her head where I stayed. And what a nice surprise at the end :)

Single In The City said...

Yours was great! I loved it...

ANGEL POWER!!!!!!

I did my first one also!

Jeff B said...

I lkiie the first person approach to the story. The way you went full circle with the "wrapping up in a box" was really cool too.

Raven said...

Don't know what happened to the comment I left last night (Agh... maybe senility is finally taking over), but since it's not here....

Great job. I like the way it ends. Reminds me a little of a speech in one of my favorite ever movies, Babette's Feast. Very nicely done - and cool surprise at the end.

Farmer*swife said...

Thanks y'all for the read and the feedback. It is so nice to ramble a story, feel proud that I did it yet...slacking if it will not live up to everyone else's (not competitively but quality).

It's so fun to run around and read everyone after I'm up. Then I feel all fuzzy at how we all manage to imaginate a story, some different, some similar in ways...

I've loved this project! Thanks for participating, thanks for reading, thanks r.e.h. for coming up with it...and thanks for commenting!

R.E.H. said...

This was your best one yet! Though I really liked the fairy tale of last month too - but this one showed signs of maturity (I thought).

I really loved the whole feel and theme to the story. And, the ending was a perfect twist and surprise ending.

Absolutely wonderful work!

Dianne said...

I really love the who idea of living loud (too loud at times) to drown out regret and pain. Very insightful.

Great work!

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