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Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Dear Mother Nature,

Dear Mother Nature,

I'm not quite sure but it seems that you are somewhat extremely upset totally peeved off in a hells bells way.  I'm not sure who was cruel enough to upset you d@mn Terrorists or maybe the Canadians, I bet, but on whomever's behalf I would like to apologize.

My Northeaster Friends are snowed in by mountains feet and are freezing their assets toesies off.

And, your arctic hand is now reaching across our nation all the way down to where typically, the warm wind gusts alone would poach an egg.

I am respectfully begging requesting that you pull back your wrath back up to where the temps are warm and pretty down here with winter in the fair to low 60s and my Northeastern friends survive as if spring with 40s for highs.

The weather man said when you get here tomorrow that our "Feels like" will be in the 20s.  If this is the case, we will all freeze where we stand should we try to exit the house or vehicle.  I have a much needed eye appointment and groceries to purchase tomorrow (I'd scheduled both errands as we expected you on Friday.  I might say it's a tat bit rude to show up 24 hours early without notice... [shaking finger])

Dressing like the Michelin man makes us all look quite portly they don't sell that type of weather protective clothing down here.  The masses are probably flooding the shoe stores as most can live the whole year through in open toed shoes, some in flip-flops.  (I know, seasonal inappropriate, but anyhoo).

Anyhow, if you wanna' come vacation here it is much nicer when it is warm.  Might you meet with your  assistant, the Sun, and discuss a weather change?  The surfing is quite nice when the winds are up (and warm)!

Either way, you are welcome to come by for some meatloaf and mashed taters and gravy.  But, if your temps run under 60 you'll have to hang out with our freezer in the garage.  No offense, but we run a temp maintained house and it is out of my hands there is no bleepin' way you are bringing your cold @$$ in.

Thank you kindly and respectfully,


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8 comments:

Melissa said...

It felt "warm" to me today in the upper teens, low twenties with little wind. We're used to it, I suppose, but I feel sorry for you all right now. ;-)

Karen said...

I'd like to ass my signature to that letter.
Sincerely,
Freezing my hiney off in Florida (if only that were truly possible!)

Prohomemaker.Com said...

Brrr to you! I think it's freezing here when it hits 38 at night in the winter. (BTW was 73 today here in SoCal)

Harry <--- running away before he's hit

Emmeline said...

hahahahahaha. this is great. unfortunately, I don't feel sympathetic because where i'm at, we just got our third snow in a week. and the temps have not been above 30 for quite some time now. hope you guys survive it okay, though! :)

Em

The Queen said...

With the win chill, it is -30 for a high here today..and tomorrow.. I don't think she is listening..

The State of Kansas has officially shut down until warmer weather..

We are all on strike!

kcinnova said...

When we get above freezing in a few more days, I'll rustle up some sympathy. ;)
No, really, I get it. My BFF in Dallas assures me it has been colder there than here.

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Baseball Mom said...

I am so glad we are seeing warmer temps now. Woo hoo were in the 20's.

Missed stopping by .. ((HUGGLES))

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