Friday at FIVE! LIVE!

Okay, well I "was" live but Macxine did her speedy gone-vloggie-gone-wild bit and so I removed it. Poo-ville. Way to ruin my 5:30, Friday party "Macxine!" No more vlogs for you for awhile. NO MA'AM. I'm going to start using the mini-HD type flip cam I got with my Christmas money from Daddy. AND, it came with a cute mini-tripod. So, it will be video uploads only for awhile. Sorry, y'all missed all the funny on tape. But, there are still some good laughs listed below -- wait for it though, you might have to put your brain into a few of them for a couple of seconds!

Macxine also left out the REMINDER to please participate in my Laugh-Fest post below with some funnies before midnight?  I got a few fantastic replies but crap-diddle, it's a little too little.  Oh, and it's also the last EVENING to WIN Bunny topped pencils by our Favorite Pottery Guy, Gary....

With all that, I'll leave y'all to ponder the following:  

CREATIVE PUNS FOR 'EDUCATED MINDS'  1. The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was  Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.    2. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but  it turned out to be an optical Aleutian.    3. She was only a whisky maker, but he loved her still.    4. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class  because it was a weapon of math disruption.    5. The butcher backed into the meat grinder and got a  little behind in his work.    6. No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll  still be stationery.    7. A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited  for littering.    8. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result  in Linoleum Blownapart.    9. Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.    10. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.    11. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.    12. Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One  hat said to the other, 'You stay here; I'll go on a head.'    13. I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then  it hit me.

 14. A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said:  'Keep off the Grass.'    15. A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a  hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was,  a nurse said, 'No change yet.'  

 16. A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.    17. The short fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a  small medium at large.    18. The man who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is  now a seasoned veteran.    19. A backward poet writes inverse.

 20. In democracy it's your vote that counts. In  feudalism it's your count that votes.  

Friday at FIVE! LIVE!