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Thursday, March 27, 2008

Backtalk: 5 years old going on 15

So, my daughter isn't quite five years old yet. She still has another seven weeks or so. But, I sware she's gonna' skip five years anyhow (after her Tea Party) and jump straight into the body of a fifteen year old.

Here are some conversations/disagreements we've had lately:

daughter: "Mama, can we stop at Dairy Queen today?"

me: "No, not today but if y'all are really good maybe we will stop after school on Friday."

daughter: "No Mama! Turn that way to the Dairy Queen."

me: "I told you, were aren't going today."

daughter: "Hmmpf! You're not being a very nice Mama! I'm not your child anymore!"

[dinner and bath time]

me: "Kids, dinner is running behind so go ahead and get your baths or showers now, Okay?"

son: "Okay, Mama. [Happily and respectfully] I'm gonna' take a shower!!

daughter: "No, bath time is AFTER dinner."

me: "Tonight, bath time is BEFORE dinner."

daughter: "I'm not bathing until AFTER dinner. I'm not taking baths and showers all the time, every day!"

me: "You are not going to be a stinky girl. Go get in the tub." [I grab the paddle (wooden spoon)]. Daughter disgruntingly exits to her bathroom.

two minutes later...

me: [Checking on kids] Are y'all in the shower?

son: "Almost done!" As I'm peaking on him and the bathroom is completely steamed up because he likes hot showers like me.

daughter: [daughter is not in bathroom. No water is running in tub or from shower. Daughter is discovered sprawled on her bed in teenage fashion flipping through a "Tinkerbell" book.]

me: "Little Girl! You better get in that shower right now!"

daughter: "I DON'T CARE!!!"

me: "You're BUTT'S gonna' care in about 25 seconds!"

daughter: [Grunting and huffingly gets up and heads to shower].

Son and daughter complete bathing and return for dinner. Everyone is kind, thoughtful and loveable. Daughter's halo has been returned or the shower polished the tarnishing away.

[on the way to school this morning]

Kids are fighting as I enter the vehicle. Over who's back pack is in who's way and taking up how much room. I remove both backpacks from the back seat and place them up from with me. Problem solved.

daughter: (yelling) "Give me back my back pack!"

me: "I'll give it back when you can request it respectfully."

daughter: (still yelling) "But it has my toys in it!"

me: "When you can be nice to your brother and myself, then maybe you can have your back pack back!"

This continues down the drive until I hit the breaks and threaten to remove daughter from vehicle and provide the appropriate (spanking) attitude adjustment she requires.

daughter: As I exit vehicle to lock the gate. "Well, your not a very good Mommy. I'm going to live in "another world." I'm gonna' run away!"

me: "No one would take you with that attitude."

After closing gate I return to a quiet vehicle. Daughter is apparently thinking about my previous statement.

daughter: [half way to school] "Mama? May I pleeeaase have my back pack back?"

me: "When I come to a place to stop safely so I can reach it....maybe, I'll give you back your back pack."

Daughter is now all peaches and cream to myself and her brother. I finally return her back pack with this statement. "See? When you are nice and kind and respectful you get something you want and others will be nice. Attitude will NOT get you what you want."

Lesson has been learned, until the next time.

Parenting is hard. But, those hugs, kisses, sweet words and faces. Wouldn't trade it for the world. My only fear is how things will be when she actually IS fifteen....teenagers.

Happy Thursday!


Jay said...

I have a friend who has these HUGE raging battles with her son every morning. Not so much now, but when he was 6 or 7 and she had to get him up for school everyday it was something to watch. They'd scream at each other and he'd throw things and refuse to eat. Then at the last second he'd eat his breakfast and storm out of the house to catch the bus. But, then he'd turn around and say "By mom, see ya this afternoon!" LOL

Anonymous said...

It's a test. It's all about tests till they learn.

Anonymous said...

Well when those lil adorable eyes hit you.. I get all goo goo eyed!! But my niece is like that also when she does not get her way..

I had to learn to stay firm because i caved in every time! Please teach me how to discipline her!!!!

Knight said...

Oh boy, hopefully she gets it all out now and by the time she is fifteen it will just be a fight to get her off the phone. Man she is one cute kid though. That little face has to make you smile.

R.E.H. said...

Be very afraid, woman. Be very afraid of when she becomes a teen ;)

Seriously. I have no first hand experience, of course, but my cousin's daughther turns fourteen today. We'll be going over there on Sunday to have the cake and hand over presents.

I'm sure your kids will turn out fine even in their teens though.

g-man said...

LOL!!!! After 4 kids (19,14,7,5) I have had those exact conversations before. (They never go away they just change syntax) Soon it will be no video games, or no car keys, etc ...

Good luck :)

Eric Shonkwiler said...

It's encouraging to find a parent who's still willing to tan a hide. My hat's off to you.